“And after six days Jesus took with him Peter and James and John, and led them up a high mountain by themselves.” Mark 9:2
This morning I woke up with a lot of clamour in my head. The weekend was busy and noisy and I hadn’t had a chance to process all the stuff going on and get my myself in a good frame on mind to start out the new week. This morning I also woke up feeling burdened and heavy. There are lots of people I care about going through trying times and it had been awhile since I’d been able to unload and release them to God. This morning I woke up feeling disconnected, a bit disoriented, and feeling the need to find my way back to my path again. When I woke up this morning I was aching to get away by myself on a high mountain with Jesus somewhere so I could clear out the noise, pray for my people, and reorient myself and my heart to him again.
I didn’t get to climb that mountain this morning, but thankfully Jesus is just as happy to meet me on the sofa and at my desk and as I take my dog for his morning walk. I just need to turn off the devices and turn my attention towards him. I can come before him, regardless of how great or not great I feel. I can invite him to meet with me in the space I have opened up, and I can talk to him about my people and the other things that are weighing on me. I can open his word and ask him to grow my knowledge of him, give me a fresh vision of him, and saturate my soul with his presence. It’s not the top of a mountain, but sometimes, like the disciples who went up with Jesus, I catch glimpses of what it looks like from up there.
Oswald Chambers says we are apt to want to stay on the mountain top where we see things from God’s standpoint, but Jesus didn't let the disciples do that and God never lets us (My Utmost for His Highest, Oct. 1 reading). Mountain top retreats are for empowering us to live with a God-perspective and God-given strength in the place where we all live – the valley of the ordinary and every day. It’s where we jostle each other, crowd each other’s spaces, and push and pull and give and take and work to negotiate what’s right and good for everyone. It's where people hurt and hurt each other, and get sick and have their hearts broken and lose their way. It's the world into which we all have to enter every single day.
My day needs to start so I close my Bible. I give thanks to Jesus for cleaning me out, filling me up and pointing me in the right direction once again. I might mess it all up the minute I leave this space, but I'm thankful for these moments and thankful I can come back whenever I need to.
Jesus, thank you for times like this where I can retreat from the day to be with you and be filled and refuelled by your presence. Thank you for drawing me to you and thank you for showing up and showing yourself strong to me. Thank you for caring about the things and people that I care about. Thank you hearing me out and for gladly taking my burdens on yourself. Thank you for coming with me into my day. I love you; thank you for loving me way more. I’m eternally and gratefully yours.
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